“I believe that when you are in a dominant position, in any aspect of life, that you have great responsibility to your subordinates. It is not an opportunity to “do whatever”, but a requirement to lead, be supportive, nurture and encourage. That includes demanding that subordinates tell you what they are thinking and feeling about your leadership. A sincere critic, one that comes from a position of love and trust, is the best gift you can have. It helps keep your head out of your own ass; it helps you from believing your own hype; it keeps you from perceived consent violations.”

“If there is open and honest communication both ways about needs and expectations, then people can decide whether they want to pay that price of admission. Whatever the stated requirement, once stated, then a decision can be made about whether to accept or walk — the price having been clearly stated. Perhaps more walking, or opting out, should have been done, I can’t speak to that, but it appears clear that the leader in this case did not have the best interests of his subordinates at heart, and that at a minimum he failed as a leader, and possibly at much more.”

Excerpt from writing of DownLow on Fet – thank you for saying so eloquently what we always teach.  The Dominant is responsible while the submissive is in charge.  Anything less is abusive and non-consent or can lead down a path toward such abuses.

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