header social

Have some *FUCKING* manners.

The Blunt Rantings of an Overly Irritated Onlooker

Original Post (This was too good not to share - see original post for additional comments also).

WARNING I’m a rude cunt and I make no apologies.

I’ve been in the non-monogamous lifestyle for long enough to realize not many who state they are in this particular lifestyle, have “fucking” manners. And many who do not classify themselves as “Non-monogamous” or “swingers” (etc.) do not bother with learning the protocols or “rules” of the lifestyle they’re (literally) fucking with when the idea of fucking someone in said lifestyle sounds like a cool idea for a boring Saturday night.

Is it difficult to recognize a couple is made up of two parts?
To me, it isn’t. It’s really just simple math. One person in a relationship with one person = two persons. Preschool 101.

Perhaps I was one of the lucky few who had a mentor, someone who took time to show me the ropes and teach me the basics of how to engage in sexual adventures with one part of the couple. And factor in my opposable thumbs, higher reasoning, and common sense, I think I am a step up from the animalistic decision making skills of many I bump into. If your decision making skills resemble that of a spider monkey struggling with eating a banana (Que no opposable thumbs)– this post may be for you. Feel free to add on to the long list of “does anyone know what the fuck manners are today?”

Basically, what I’ve learned in this area is:

You cannot fuck one part and ignore the other part, without fucking them both – not in a good way either. Think “sand in the asshole with unwilling anal and seagulls picking out your eyeballs”. Pretty extreme? Yes. But having your life come to a halt because of one night with one skank/douche, is pretty extreme to the person left holding the bag of bad decisions and too many “if I only”s.
Of course, not all couples are made up of the same “rules”. Which leads me to believe it is even MORE important to have open and honest dialogue with both members of the relationship. Don’t get me wrong - at the end of the day, the onus is on the couple. That being said, when the naked cha-cha is about to go down, there are now three people who are responsible.

After a great deal of reading up on this topic, I see there are a few items which have been left to limbo.

Remember…

You are introducing yourself into the middle of THEIR (plural) lives. Act accordingly. You’ve been invited into someone’s lives – don’t go in like a bull in a china shop. You’re not there to break the fine china. (Personally, when I’ve been invited to join a couple, they have put their trust in me not to walk in, fuck shit up, and walk out. They have invited me to explore in a respectful manner… I take that respect seriously – SO SHOULD YOU. Do not be the cause for a break down in a relationship – it’s a fuck head thing to do.)

Bluntly, if you are a “booty call”, you are there for a short time, not a long time – don’t fuck shit up in the short time you’re there. Take it from someone who has fucked shit up in the short time she was there – it’s an asshole and naive move, not paying attention to everyone involved. The other partner may not be there, but you can still hurt them with your words and actions. Have respect for EVERYONE. Being a “booty call” isn’t the golden ticket to being a worthless cunt, void of responsibility.

If you’re there for a long time and not a short time. See above. Same rules apply. You’ve been invited into their lives, for more than a simple fuck. They clearly trust you and care for you, don’t be a cunt. Don’t meddle. Don’t try to inject yourself deeper into the relationship. Don’t intentionally set out to ruin. Simply put – you may be there for a long time, but your time is their time, spend it wisely.

Consent. Think of it as a scene you’re watching play out. You want to join in? You need consent. You need consent from EVERYONE involved. Not just the dude sitting on the edge of the bed holding his dick in his hand, or the woman leaning against the wall playing with her nips. You need explicit consent from everyone involved in that scene. Don’t want to ask? Keep your fucking pants on and move the fuck on. Simple enough for you? If you were at a club and did a naked cannon ball into the middle of a fuck fest, you’d get your ass thrown out. Why? Because you’re a douche and didn’t ask for permission. When you do this in a relationship – throwing yourself into the middle of a couple, you’re a fucking douche. (However, if you want to fuck my partner six ways from Sunday and we’re both on the same page – you’d be surprised what I’ll do to help you make that happen. I’ll build the catapult and launch you in there all naked, myself. And make sure I’ve stocked your favorite bevvy, snacks, and pre-made sandwiches for after… who doesn’t like a sandwich after? Trust me, after a few rounds with him, no sandwiches shall be made.)

Ignoring. Now that one tickles my temper like nothing else. When you walk past one partner, to speak to the other partner, without acknowledging they have a partner. Lifestyle or no lifestyle, event or grocery store. Where the fuck are your manners? How the hell have you made it in life like this? The only thing I can really say about this is – use your head. Honestly, brains are attractive, manners are attractive. Ignoring is an express lane to the “You are not fucking that” list.

(Almost done my rant)

This is really simple. COMMUNICATE, be aware, be kind, be considerate, be respectful, know your place and acknowledge this and them. (unless you’ve been invited into the relationship, you’re on the outside of one.) The couple will do what they can to protect their relationship – don’t fuck with that. You have no right to poke at it, pull on it, or push it.

FUCKING manners are needed. I almost have whiplash from the amount of times I’ve shook my head at the complete obliviousness I witness on a regular basis.

99% of a successful relationship will rest on the shoulders of those within that relationship. That 1% is on you… a lot of damage can be done with 1%. Don’t be a cunt who uses their 1% to do harm.

kinkbnb

 

soaringeaglecard

studioentrance