At that moment I thought back to my earlier times in the lifestyle when I wouldn’t have rubbed a subs feet, when I had the mistaken idea that subs did all the caretaking. Their role was to cater to the Dom, wait on him, pamper him. At the time I had been labeled a sensual Dom by many and took that as confirmation that I took good care of my submissive.
I was misleading myself though, badly.
Then I met a married Master/slave couple. Their relationship on the outside was what I imagined. He had full control over her and made all decisions. In public she waited on him hand and foot and was the perfect slave. It was much as I had imagined a real D/s relationship.
But then in conversation he described their daily routine at home and I was shocked. Each day he got up first, made coffee, and delivered her a cup of coffee in bed. At night he drew her baths and brushed her hair. I didn’t get it at first but then it sunk in and I understood. She was the most important thing in his life and he took expert care of her, and his care fueled her devotion.
So now foot rubs are freely given and in the morning I will cook breakfast. Doing for your submissive, showing her how special she is, doesn’t make you less Domly. The more time and care you invest in a submissive the deeper your bond will be.